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Ilona Goanos's avatar

Sometimes I'm not coping at all and I feel we're doomed. Othertimes I know everything is temporary, and that this too will pass. I listen to the Rational Boomer podcast which always makes me feel better. Appreciate you, Sara!

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Thank you Ilona--I will check it out. I definitely need encouragement right now!

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Joan Geoghegan's avatar

Thanks for the Nolan Hamilton piece. May the Fourth Be With You. We soldier on.

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Thanks, Joan!

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michaela's avatar

The events of the past week have coincided with some devastating news for friends who are like family. In a weird way, I've been grateful to be consumed with supporting them and only reading headlines, rather than doing a deep wallow. Over the years I, too, have done a ton of voter outreach, from League of Women Voters to canvassing for Elizabeth Warren and phone banking for marriage equality back in the day. I am part of a local group that meets weekly to write letters for Vote Forward... my attendance has fallen off, but I think I need to get back on the horse and spend time with people who are (a) devastated and (b) doing the work.

I'm also 7 weeks away from empty nesting and I think increased community engagement needs to be a part of this next phase of my life.

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Michaela, I'm so sorry about your tough news, but thank you so much for all the great work you've done! I agree that community engagement helps!

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Abigail Thomas's avatar

Glad you found the right man and he found you. It's a drag to let men define us, but in your case it got you going in living your own life. Good for you.

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Thank you, Abigail!

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Elena's avatar

Two weeks ago, I came across your book while exploring books and articles online on healing a broken heart and recovering from years of bad dating experiences. It was refreshing to find something that didn’t make me feel pressured to completely change who I am or how I think. Your words deeply resonated with me, and for that, I am incredibly grateful. Thank you for giving me hope and helping me feel less alone.

Warm greetings from Germany

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Elena, thank you so much for telling me that. It makes me so happy to know my book was helpful! ❤️

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Tatyana Sussex's avatar

broken hearts really can crack a person open. Love your story, and this: "this is what it’s like to feel good about yourself."--esp as it was looking outward. Thank you for sharing this. I'm wondering "how to be in today's world, what to do"--which feels like a spinning go-nowhere, and your cracking open is pointing the way.

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Tatyana, I’m happy to know this resonated. “How to be in today’s world?” Is a hard question! Especially cuz the world keeps getting weirder

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Jennifer's avatar

Sara I really needed this today. I am so discouraged about the state of our country. Thank you for sharing the Nolan Hamilton piece. I have already forwarded it to folks. I need to figure out how we can all move forward. Otherwise- I may go discover all those family ties I have in Canada thanks to our family tree!

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Oh family ties in Canada sounds good! Glad you like the piece and Hamilton Nolan’s.

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A. Jesse Jiryu Davis's avatar

Thanks Sara. I wrote about Zen and politics back in 2008. I had a similar feeling, actually *doing* something eases my desperation. (Besides, sometimes it makes a difference.) Of course, 2008 seems like a golden age now. https://emptysqua.re/blog/zen-and-the-body-politic/

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Sara Eckel's avatar

I love this piece, Jesse, and that was my experience too. But yeah, that that was 2008 ...

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Monica Nastase's avatar

So many good lessons in this piece. But somehow, the bit that's stuck with me the most is the fact that in 2004 a new guy who dated you took the time and the effort to write an email to explain why he was breaking it off. No ghosting, not even a poor simple text, but an actual email to own his choice. The world we used to live in...!

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Yeah, I really think I dated in the golden age of online dating. Just after it became normal (rather than some crazy creepy thing as it was perceived before) and before Tinder. I never had a relationship come from it, but I knew many people I did, and all the men i met were perfectly decent guys. (I always did a phone call first and eliminated a few creeps that way--talking on the phone, another thing that I think has died off.)

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Monica Nastase's avatar

Talking on the phone feels like a staple of the 90s and early 2000s dating. :)

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Sara Eckel's avatar

Don’t know why people don’t like it. Saved me so much time!

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